So it’s Monday. It’s the beginning of a new week and life has seamlessly fallen back into our “normal” after a great trip away. After enjoying the Queensland sun and being graced with some warm days on our return, I was inspired to clean up the back yard a little. Lawns were mowed, fallen leaves were blower vacc’d and the trusty four burner BBQ even got a good clean in preparation for the approaching summer. I may even have got Mum to suggest that Dad should come over next weekend to put up the gazebo, fingers crossed! I sat there, on the little cafe set I picked up (for a bargain price!), admiring how handy I’ve become and realised just how lucky I am. Life is in no way perfect, but I feel the best I have in years. I say luck, and while luck plays a part, it also comes down to some hard work. Work that I, myself is constantly putting in and the hard work of others that truly love and care about me.
I’m not sure about others, but I find it really helps me with my peace of mind when I can see myself achieving things. They don’t have to be big things; they can simply be the small steps you take to make small changes. The greatest journey starts with a single step, or so they say, and life is our greatest journey of all.
So I was already feeling kind of grateful for the way things are going when I attended a parent information session this morning for the preschool/kindy that Master E will be attending next year. Yeah, a preschool meeting, of all things! The fact that I got to choose the preschool he is to attend, that it is in close proximity to where we live and that the preschool coordinator/teacher is so invested in the school and it’s programs just gave me that awesome feeling of things “just falling into place”. That one of his future teachers has been recently recognised by the Early Childhood Organisation of SA for their Award for Excellence: Early Childhood Educator; educational theory and practice and after hearing her speak today, made me sure that my choice for my son is the right one.
It’s now Monday night. I sit here thinking about my great family holiday that is already fading into fond memories (albeit captured in many photos for all eternity!), taking pride in the home I am able to provide for my children and myself and the fact that my son is no doubt going to love his preschool/kindy experience and I am feeling grateful. I am grateful for many things and I’m going to list some of them here so I will be able to revisit them when I’m having a “not-so-good-day”. We all have those every now and then! Acknowledging the things we are grateful for, whether they are through the kindness of others or through our own determination and sheer hard work is a good thing. In my case I truly feel that it’s not about being boastful, it’s about recognising how far I’ve come. Putting into words the changes I’ve made and what I have achieved pushes me to try and achieve new things. Putting stock into your own decisions and actions is a gift that we give ourselves.
So with all that, here is what I’m thankful and grateful for right now. The big, the small, the whimsical and the all encompassing.
♦ My children, they truly have been the making of me. Ensuring they are loving, caring, well adjusted children who are able to experience learning and fun within a safe, loving and caring environment makes me a better person. They force me to make the sometimes hard but right decisions so that they grow up without the burden of dysfunction as their template.
♦ My family, they are always there. They share the highs and the lows with me and always have. When life has felt hopeless and like I just can’t win, they have always been in my corner. I have had people try to break the strong bonds I have with my family but they could never succeed. We have had our differences, we can scream at each other with fury and frustration but the underlying love and respect we have for each other will never be trumped. Not by anything or anyone.
♦ I am grateful that I live in a country that has afforded me to stay at home with my children via financial support they offer most families. I work and have done so since I was 15 years old, but the time I have spent and continue to spend with my children in these formative years is invaluable and that is thanks to a country that has benefits for families.
♦ I am grateful that education is available to all Australian children, no matter what state or suburb you live in. It may not be perfect but there are families and children in countries around the world that dream of the kind of accessible education we see as a right and not a privilege. With love, encouragement and support my children can achieve whatever they want if they truly believe in themselves.
♦ I am grateful that my inner strength prevailed and I was able to leave a domestic situation that was unhealthy for my children and me. I was able to make the final break with the help of my family and my few friends who were still there after I had all but abandoned everyone through stupidity and then shame.
♦ I live in SA, so I’m thankful for the glorious wine that our many, many talented growers and wineries produce. You make those hard days so much easier!
♦ I’m thankful that I was able to learn my lesson about money and how to budget. I let my situation get dire and then was put in the impossible position of getting myself and someone else out of trouble while bringing in minimum income due to maternity entitlements. It was never going to happen while only one of us was serious about not spending. Now I don’t worry about the fuel in my car, how much food is in the house and whether or not I can afford new clothes for the kids. I afforded a holiday for the first time in 6 years!
♦ I’m grateful to my parents who obviously raised me to tackle new challenges. I now rent a place on my own and look after everything. I bought my own lawn mower and whipper snipper and just got on with what needed doing. I look after the maintenance of my home inside and out. I have bought new furniture and my house is the most organised I’ve ever had (it in no way resembles a show home but it’s a vast improvement on my previous dwellings). My landlord is lucky to have me.
♦ I love SA. I love Adelaide and the southern suburbs. We have the beach, the wine regions, the Adelaide Hills and the Mediterranean type weather. Whats not to love about having BBQ dinners outside, enjoying the extra hours of daylight after a walk along the beach with a perfect bottle of wine? Nothing!
♦ I’m grateful that I have a couple of girlfriends that still reply to my messages after years of on and off again neglect. Even a girl I had not seen in years connected with me recently and I can’t wait to catch up with her again. You may not know it girls, but Marie, Kate and Lisa, you are my connection to the “old me”. A me I quite liked. I’ll never be her again, but I can meet her somewhere in the middle.
♦ I’m grateful that people I haven’t seen for years, some for more than 15-20 years, have reached out just to let me know that I’m a good person and that I should be proud of my achievements. Unless you’ve had that happen after years of feeling disconnected from friends, from being socially isolated and called names like “socially retarded” you have no idea how that can restore ones belief in themself. I am not unable to make friends and I will not let anyone steal my friendships away again with their poisoned tongue fuelled by their own ineptitude.
There is much in life to be grateful for, to give thanks for. This is where I’m at right now. I’m sure there will be many more people/things/situations/experiences that I will be lucky enough to be thankful for in the future and for that, I am eternally grateful.
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