Why Do We Fail To Reach Our Goals?

Reach for the moon; even if you fall short you’ll land among the stars.

The sky isn’t the limit if you’re reaching for the stars.

Reach high, for the stars are within your soul. Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.

Everyone loves a motivational quote and reaching for the stars seems to be especially popular. While these quotes are positive (I particularly like that last one!) they are just so generally ambiguous. Pop “motivation” into Google and you will be hit with an ever-lasting supply of quotes, articles and of course, motivational videos. Never give up, you got this, be the change you want to be, dream big! You get the idea. With all this material just a few keystrokes away why is it still so hard to make goals and stay motivated enough to reach them? There must surely be a video for every person for every situation! It’s all-good to have big dreams and to aim high, but the whole learning to walk before you can run comes to mind. I don’t mean to be a downer and I’m certainly not saying you shouldn’t be making goals but I definitely think there is a way to do it that will see you have a better chance at success. I believe it all comes down to the sort of goals we are making and whom we choose to surround ourselves with. Most success doesn’t come to people overnight. Even “overnight sensations” have usually been slogging it out in the lead up before they are recognised and they usually have at least one solid support person cheering them on. The other common denominator with these successful people is this, consistency.

Consistency. Making the conscious decision to keep going even when things get hard isn’t easy. We lose focus, have a change of heart, or simply give up. Life gets in the way, our priorities shift and we decide that it’s just all too difficult. We naturally like routine and being comfortable, so challenges that have us switching things up dramatically are almost always going to see us fail. This is where I think we can change the way we set goals. Dramatic change can work for some, but most of us need small manageable changes in order to keep going. For example, dropping a couple of dress sizes in a week may be entirely possible but staying on that kind of restrictive diet isn’t only going to see you perusing Ubereats and binging when you hit a hard day, it’s not likely to be very good for you. Saying “I want to be a professional (insert anything)” but not taking the steps you need every single day to get there obviously isn’t going to work.

I’ve found when setting goals I need to really break them down. Small achievable goals are ok, in fact they are an amazing way to start making changes and get into a habit of consistency. The trick is setting an achievable goal that then acts as a foundation for the next one. Every small goal achieved is a step forward and a great source of motivation to hit the next goal head on. Breaking your goals down into little bite-sized pieces is all about simplifying and taking small steps in the right direction. Take exercise for example. I really wanted to improve my fitness but didn’t know where to start. I’m a visual person so decided to get myself a Fitbit, having the numbers in front of me gave the motivation to keep improving my daily targets bit by bit. My step goals and other targets have dramatically changed over the last 2 years and my fitness has greatly improved.

Another huge contributing factor in achieving your goals is to surround yourself with like-minded people. I know this seems kind of obvious but so many of us try to go it alone. The thing is, even with small goals that are easier to reach you’re going to run into days where your personal motivation takes a dive. Some days are hard, we get thrown a curve ball and all we want to do is throw our hands up. By having people you can call on when it gets tough, you really do improve your chances of success. Having people to bounce ideas off of, give non-judgemental feedback, answer questions and be accountable to is invaluable. Also, misery loves company. If you’re looking to be successful, happy and healthy, move away from negativity seek out positive people and watch how much easier it is to reach those goals.

Some of my goals for the next 3 months

1. De-clutter my life – especially the house and car. I seem to accumulate so much paper!

2. Get outside more – it’s going to be warming up soon which means beach walks, eating outside, riding our bikes. Call on friends to walk with, go to playground etc.

3. Get the kids more involved with dinner choices and prep in the hope they broaden their current (limited) culinary horizons.

4. Continue making healthy nutritional choices for myself.

5. Share my ideas and my journey in the hopes of helping others.

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Pie in the sky dreams are great but positive, realistic and achievable accomplishments can be life changing.

#women #Motivation #friends #life #Goals